


About Time

by lls_mutant



Category: Battlestar Galactica (2003)
Genre: Backstory, First Time, M/M, how they got together, would it have killed you to put it in the series?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-01-08
Updated: 2011-01-08
Packaged: 2017-10-14 13:22:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,799
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/149632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lls_mutant/pseuds/lls_mutant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When he got off New Caprica, Felix Gaeta's life pretty much sucked.  But a new friendship with Louis Hoshi really made it a lot better.  Written for the slash category in the bsg_kink kink-off.</p>
            </blockquote>





	About Time

_Thunk._

Felix looked up as someone plopped a tray down at his table, surprised. No one had sat with him since he'd gotten back on board except for Tyrol. Well, Dee had tried, but their schedules in the broken CIC made that difficult.

"Hi," Hoshi said, sitting down. "Mind if I sit here?"

"Guess not," Felix answered, because it didn't seem to matter either way. Not that he _did_ mind- Hoshi was good company with a good sense of humor. Felix knew that from slow days before New Caprica, when they would joke around over the wireless. "What's up?"

"Not much." Hoshi stuck his fork into the quivering blob on his plate. "This _is_ supposed to be macaroni and cheese, right?"

"So they say," Felix said with a cautious grin. "I can tell you're new to _Galactica_. Even before the attacks, you _never_ got the macaroni and cheese. Unless you want your stomach to turn to cement."

Hoshi made a face. "Great," he muttered, then sighed. "Well, maybe the _Pegasus_ staff can teach them something."

"Like that cheese isn't supposed to have the texture of super glue?"

"And that you should at least dissolve the powder before serving it." Hoshi shuddered. "Okay. Lesson learned. Avoid the macaroni and cheese on the _Galactica._ "

Felix smiled, but his smile was brief. He noticed that there were people watching them covertly, and he couldn't help imagining that there was whispering. Maybe there was; it was impossible to tell.

Hoshi didn't seem to notice; he was still focused on his lunch. "We were really lucky on the _Pegasus_ ," he said, and Felix noticed there was an edge in his voice when he said the ship's name. "The Admiral actually liked food. She made it a point to poach the really good KP staff."

"Lucky," Felix said, looking back down at his lunch and poking it.

"No kidding," Hoshi said affably. "How was the food down on New Caprica?"

Felix's head snapped up. "What?"

Hoshi looked innocent. "How was the food on New Caprica? I didn't make it down there much."

It was like Kara all over again. Felix stood up. "I don't have to listen to this. I-"

"Wait, Felix." Hoshi grabbed his wrist. "I didn't mean anything by it. I was just…"

"Just what?"

Hoshi shrugged. "I know that New Caprica wasn't the greatest thing ever, and I know you've gotten some shit over it. But you were down there for over a _year_. There must have been something good about it."

"Why would you _care_?" Felix asked, flabbergasted.

Hoshi shrugged. "Look, I know we weren't close before you went down to New Caprica, but I thought we were friends."

"We were."

"And I'd like to think we still are." Hoshi's expression was genuine. "I'm not trying to accuse you or anything. I just was asking about New Caprica. If you'd really rather I didn’t, I won't, but…" he petered out.

Felix relaxed. Hoshi looked so _honest_ , so sincere about what he was saying. "I'm sorry," he said, sitting back down. "Just… had a few run-ins already." He didn't realize how little he was expecting kindness until he actually encountered it.

"It's all right." Hoshi smiled. "We can talk about something else, if you want."

Felix relaxed a lot more. "No, it's okay," he said. He smiled. It was nice to have a friend again.

***

"Felix." Louis poked his head into Felix's lab. "We're getting a group together for Pyramid. Want to join us?"

Felix looked down at the star charts and frowned. He was completely blocked on the calculations, but Pyramid…. "I'm a lousy player," he admitted.

"It's just a bunch of us playing," Louis said with a shrug. "Come on. Even if all you are is a warm body, we can use you." He grinned. "You can play for their side."

"Funny. Who's playing?"

"Narcho, Showboat, Martins, Firelli… just some of the _Pegasus_ people," Louis said.

Not just _Pegasus_ people, Felix realized, but if he was right, _Pegasus_ people who hadn't been down on New Caprica. "Yeah, all right," he said, pushing his star charts aside. "But I warned you."

"You can't be _that_ bad," Louis said, grinning as Felix locked up his lab. His eyes raked over Felix. "You don't _look_ like you'd be that bad."

"Looks can be deceiving," Felix muttered.

They walked easily through the halls of _Galactica_ together, Felix explaining about the calculations he had been doing as Louis listened intently. Apparently, the _Pegasus_ had had a state of the art NAVQUAL package, and Louis had gotten rusty on the basics. Felix was so lost in their conversation it didn't even really register where they were headed.

"Wait," he said, as they wound their way through yet another corridor, "where are we going?"

Louis shrugged. "The _Galactica_ doesn't have the individual courts like the _Pegasus_ did," he said. "We've found an old storage room."

"Really?" For a moment, Felix was wistful. As much as he loved the _Galactica_ , he remembered his initial disappointment on seeing it, and wishing he'd been assigned to a more modern, more active ship. "Well, I guess everyone makes do with what they can."

Louis misinterpreted his expression. "I'm not trying to put down _Galactica_ , by the way."

"No, I know."

"It's just that I know how it feels to have _your_ ship, you know?" Louis stopped and opened a door. "Believe me, I feel- _felt_ \- that way about the _Pegasus_."

It was the first time in the two months since the Exodus that Felix had heard Louis even come close to mentioning how he felt about the _Pegasus_ 's destruction. He wanted to say something, but he wasn't sure what he should say, and anyway, he had the impression Louis was avoiding his eye. Louis led the way into the storage room, where several players were already ranged out, tossing a ball back and forth.

"Hoshi!" Narcho greeted him with a high five. "Where have you been? Did you find us an eighth?" He was bare from the waist up and already sweaty.

"I did." Louis said, stripping his sweatshirt off but leaving his tanks on. "This is Gaeta."

Felix found himself bracing as the others looked at him. "So you're Gaeta," a tall woman with a long face said. He tensed further, but she just smiled. "I'm Martins," she said, extending a hand.

"Should I be alarmed you know who I am?" Felix asked, trying to sound light and joking and failing miserably.

"Nah." It was a woman he was almost positive that answered to the callsign 'Showboat' that spoke up. "You were one of the ones Admiral Cain wanted to poach from _Galactica_." She smirked at his shocked expression. "You really didn't know?"

"No. No one ever said…" he glanced around, but Showboat was off the subject already, stripping off her tanks and down to her sports bra.

"Which one of you is playing shirts and which one's skins?" Firelli asked Hoshi.

"You guys can have Felix," Hoshi said with a grin. "I'll keep my shirt on, thanks." He winked at Felix, and then caught the ball as Martins passed it to him.

All of Felix's worries about his own playing abilities were for nothing, he discovered quickly. True, he couldn't play Pyramid for shit, but neither could anyone else in this group. But it was fun, and he laughed more than he had since… gods, since _when_? By the end, he was sweaty and joking with all of them, feeling like he'd been a part of this group… not all his life, but long enough.

And Louis… Felix didn't think he was imagining it that Louis was watching him, checking to see if he was enjoying himself. It felt strange at first, but after a while, Felix found himself kind of liking it. After all, Louis was funny, he was smart, and he was a genuinely nice guy. He hadn't considered anything like that before, and still wasn't sure he wanted to consider it now, but if Louis was interested….

That was his train of thought, anyway, when the gorilla knocked on the door.

He wasn’t _actually_ a gorilla, Felix admitted to himself later. He was just an extremely tall, heavily muscled marine with a shaved head and heavy brows. He nodded to the others, and Louis broke away to say something to him quietly. They didn't touch, but there was something about the way they both stood that made it clear to Felix that they were involved.

It surprised him, a bit, that that disappointed him. But at least he'd found out before this idea got planted in his brain. The last thing he needed was to fall for _yet another_ man that wasn't going to love him back.

He pushed the idea from his mind and when Louis joined the game again, tossed the ball to him with a laugh. And by the time they all broke up to get back to their days, Felix was eager to say that he'd join them again.

***

"Hey Gaeta." Narcho pushed the door open, but hung back on the lab's threshold. "Do you know where Hoshi is?"

Felix looked up. "No. You're the third person who's asked me that. Why should I know?"

Narcho blinked at him. "You guys are together, aren't you?"

"What? No." Felix was surprised. "Did he- why would you think that?"

"He brought you to play Pyramid with us," Narcho said. "And you've stuck around. I just figured that you guys were an item."

"No."

"Oh. Oops. Well, if you do see him, tell him I'm looking for him, will you?"

"Yeah, sure." Felix watched Narcho go, frowning.

***

"So, I hear Narcho put his foot in his mouth," Louis said as he took two glasses from his locker and then poured Felix a drink.

Felix was setting up the chess board on the table in the center of the duty locker. "Huh? Oh, yeah, I guess." He shrugged. "That's _Galactica_. Believe me, I've heard my name paired with worse people."

"Yeah? Like who?" Louis asked, raising an eyebrow. He settled down in the chair across from Felix, setting Felix's drink down beside him.

Felix took a sip and shrugged. "Oh, I don't know. There was the rumor about me and Snake Eyes, and then there was one about Kreveers down in supply-"

"Andrea Kreveers?" Louis moved a pawn.

"Yeah." Felix made a wry face. "Not really my type."

"What _is_ your type?" Louis asked, not looking up from the board.

Felix shrugged. "Smart, I guess. Sarcastic." He smirked slyly at Louis. "Generally not the big, brawly marines."

Louis's head jerked up. "What the- you _know_ about John?"

"Didn't know that was his name," Felix said, a smile tugging at his lips as he moved one of his own pieces. "It's not a rumor," he said, when the startled expression didn't leave Louis's face. "I just saw you guys together a couple times, and figured it out. Why?"

Louis frowned, considered his pieces, and then moved before he answered Felix's question. "I'm pretty good at keeping sex and love separate," he said. "And one of the ways to do that is not to have everyone knowing about the sex. I mean, I like John. He's a good guy. But it's not ever going to go anywhere."

He said it with total certainty. Felix looked at him admiringly. "You don't think you'd change your mind?"

"Nope. Your move, by the way." Felix studied the board. "Don't you ever do that?" Louis asked.

"What? Sex just for sex?" Felix asked. He considered, and then moved a rook and took one of Louis's pawns. "No, but not for the reason you're thinking. I just never seem to find anyone who's interested in just sex."

"Ah."

Felix didn't want to look at him. "My last few relationships were something of a mess," he admitted. "And I have a tendency to go for men that just…"

"Are Gaius Baltar?" Louis asked. Felix's own head snapped up, and Louis shrugged sheepishly. "Like you said, it's _Galactica_ ," he explained. "Gossip runs rampant."

"Yeah," Felix sighed. "Since everyone knows… yeah. He just wasn't interested beyond a blow job or two. Which kind of surprised me, you know, because frankly, I thought Gaius would frak anything that got him off, but guess I was wrong about that."

"Just as well, from the sounds of it," Louis said darkly. But his darkness wasn't judgment, Felix realized. It sounded more like how Dee talked about Baltar, like a protective friend. "I've had some messes myself," Louis admitted. "Last one I was serious about couldn't keep his dick to himself."

"Ouch."

"Yeah. And everyone's life's been a mess. It's easier right now just to have sex and not give a shit."

"Sounds nice," Felix muttered. "Check, by the way." He sighed. "I can't believe we're actually talking about this. I can't believe _I'm_ actually talking about this."

"Feelings and sex?" Louis laughed, successfully avoiding a checkmate. "It's not like teenage girls have a monopoly on it. And like you've said, this is _Galactica._ "

"Yeah, but who started this conversation?" Felix teased back. "I believe it was the _Pegasus_ officer."

Louis smiled back at him. He had a very, very nice smile.

By the time Felix left that night for his own rack he had a good buzz going and a smile on his face. Even when he saw John the Gorilla headed for the officer's racks, his smile didn't waver.

Not much, anyway.

***

Helo sat down when Felix was half eating, half working his way through a stack of course corrections. "How's it going?"

"Not so good," Felix said with a scowl. "The President is supposedly religious, right? So why doesn't she recognize it when I pull quotes like 'a captor in the house of the gods' or 'the alignment of three apostles of light' out of my ass?"

"They do sound good," Helo admitted.

"Yeah. But they don't get us much of anywhere." Felix sighed, pushed the calculations away, and flexed his fingers. "Not that Roslin doesn't know that. But ever since the Lion's Head Nebula…" he shook his head. "The clues are just too vague."

"You're stressed," Helo diagnosed. "Don't you ever actually relax anymore?"

"Sometimes," Felix shrugged. "I play Pyramid."

"You," Helo said with a half snort. " _You_ play Pyramid?"

"I know, right?" Felix couldn't help smiling back. "Yeah, with some of the guys from the _Pegasus._ "

"That's right. I knew that. Any truth to the rumors about you and Hoshi?"

"Those are still going?" Felix asked, surprised. Helo nodded, and Felix sighed. "No. No truth. Louis has got a… thing."

"Ah. Figured there wouldn't be, anyway."

"Why's that?"

Helo sat back, munching on a rehydrated vegetable. "Hoshi's a nice guy. Not your type."

"Funny," Felix said.

"I thought so." Helo shrugged. "You do have bad taste in guys, Felix."

"Yeah, I know." Felix decided to plunge on a question that had been bugging him for a while. "Tell me something though, Helo. If I have such bad taste, why can't I find a guy who's up for a couple good fraks and that's it?"

"You're joking, right?" Helo watched him, and when Felix just glared, his eyes widened. "Oh, Gods, you're serious." He looked around frantically, and then signaled. "Dee!" he shouted, waving. "Come here! You've got to hear this!"

"What the-"

Dee approached, balancing her tray with a wary expression. "What's going on?"

"Felix here is complaining about the fact he can't find a man," Helo said, a maniacal glint in his eye.

Dee perked up as she sat down. "You're kidding," she said, a little too gleefully. "Well, what about Lieutenant Hoshi? I know he's-"

"Hoshi's got a _thing_ ," Helo said sagely.

"Oh. A _thing_."

"And Felix wants a _thing._ "

Felix buried his face in his hands. "I don't know why I ever tell either of you _anything_ ," he muttered. "At least Narcho had the decency to keep his mouth shut."

"Well, speaking of, what about Narcho?" Dee suggested. "I know he seems like an ass, but-"

"But an ass is the last thing he needs," Helo argued.

"Actually," Dee pointed out, "I think an ass is _exactly_ what Felix needs."

Helo got it, and then shook his head. "No way. He's a total bottom."

"Really? I would have thought a top. Felix can be awfully pushy," Dee said.

"Yeah. That's why I'd say he's a bottom," Helo argued. "In fact, I-"

"Enough!" Felix slammed his hands down. "Seriously. Does everyone have friends like this?" He grabbed his bowl and his star charts and stood up.

"Felix…" Dee began, but he was storming out.

***

"So I hear you had our esteemed XO and the communications officer groveling to you the other day," Louis laughed as they undressed for their showers after Pyramid.

"There was not enough groveling in all twelve worlds to make up for what they did," Felix said, but he laughed as he said it. Of course there had been enough, and Dee and Helo had apologized so sincerely that Felix almost felt bad for getting so mad in the first place. "They deserved it."

"So I hear." Louis grinned wickedly. But the humor faded fast. "It drives me nuts when people get into the whole 'is he a top or a bottom?' thing."

"Yeah," Felix said, looking down at the towel in his hands.

"I just don't get why everyone assumes it's this big personality thing, you know?" This was obviously a subject Louis felt strongly about. He stripped off his sweaty tanks and shoved them in his bag. "Is it really that hard to understand it's all about what sensations people like? I mean, they really do feel very different."

"Uh-huh."

"Like anal sex is everything anyway. Or like everyone does the same thing all the time. There's something to be said for switching it up. Don't you think?"

"Erm, I guess." Felix felt like the situation was quickly slipping out of his control.

Louis studied him, and then realization set in. "Like I said," he muttered, "like anal is everything anyway. I'm sorry. I didn't realize that wasn't your thing. It's just such a pet peeve of mine that I assume everyone shares it. Which is _really_ stupid if you think about it, but I do."

"Yeah." Felix sighed. "It's not that," he admitted, amazed that his mouth was moving. "It's just a sore subject."

"Really?" Louis kicked off his pants. "Bad experience?"

"More like no experience."

Louis stared at him. "You're joking."

Felix shrugged. "Not really," he said. "I mean, it's not a big deal," he hastily clarified. "I told you, I have bad luck with men. I fall hard for the ones that don't give a shit about me, and on the rare occasions I _do_ manage to score, it ends up being quick hand jobs or blow jobs out of the way somewhere." He folded his towel, even though he was still dressed. "I'm not waiting for the right person to come along. I'm just waiting for _a_ person to come along."

"You've got to be kidding." Louis still looked baffled. "I mean, come on. Nothing in high school?"

"I was five foot even and ninety eight pounds. _I_ wouldn't have frakked me in high school."

"College? Or Academy?"

"Too busy trying to be number one in the class. And the one boyfriend I did have was not remotely interested in trying."

"A bar back on the Colonies?"

"That's where I got those hand jobs and blow jobs. And I got posted to _Galactica._ "

"And you don't fraternize even when we can drag you out of the CIC," Louis said with a nod. "And there was no one on New Caprica?"

 _New Caprica._ Felix looked away. "I was so crazy about Gaius," he said. "I didn't want to screw up my chances. And then after the Cylons came…" he slammed the door on _that_ memory. "It's just never happened. With a guy, anyway. I've slept with women. All of two of them, anyway."

"Well, I've never done _that_ ," Louis admitted. He kept his face perfectly straight. "Can't risk the cooties, you know."

Felix whacked him with his towel, feeling slightly better. Louis was surprised, yes, but he didn't seem to be thinking that Felix was this terrible freak for never having tried anal sex. "But yeah," Felix said finally. "I was trying to ask Dee and Helo for a way to meet someone- hell, I was trying to work it around to maybe they could hook me up with someone, just to blow off a little steam. You know, like you and John do? But then it turned into this giant _embarrass Felix_ fest and…" he sighed and finally began to undress. Then the light bulb went on. "You don't know anyone, do you? A guy who's decent and available and discreet and in the right rank window, and just willing to have a few fraks?"

"That's all you're looking for?" Louis asked. "Sex with no attachments?"

"Well, if there was someone I wanted to have a relationship with, I'd pursue that," Felix said a little crossly. "But right now, believe me, it's best this way."

"I'll keep my eye open for you," Louis said. He wrapped his towel around his waist and headed for the showers.

"I can't believe I just asked you that," Felix said, folding his own clothing. He was nervous, and at the same time, excited. And at the same time, a little disappointed. He'd kind of been hoping- just a little- that Louis would volunteer himself. Oh well.

He tied his towel around his waist and went to take his own shower.

***

"I don't know why you're hanging around him so much."

Felix was about to walk into the officer's racks to return a book to Louis when he heard the voice and froze. Something told him now was not the right time to go in there. The speaker sounded like Stinger, but Felix wasn't completely sure.

"I don't see why it’s your business, Captain." That voice _was_ Louis's, and it was cold. "Who I choose to spend time with is not something that's up for discussion.

"He was a collaborator and a traitor!" Stinger shouted. "You weren't on the ground, Hoshi. I was. I _saw_ it."

"You saw what he wanted you to see!" Louis shot back. "He couldn't get high level information from the Cylons unless they trusted him! And in case you missed it, he was a frakking _inside source_. He did a hell of a lot for the Resistance, and more than hiding guns or blowing shit up!"

"And while he wasn't doing that he was approving ration cuts and posting curfews and organizing Centurion patrols! Gaeta's hands are not as lily-white clean as you want to believe!"

"I never said they were! But damn it, do you think any last one of us from the _Pegasus_ is in any position to sit judgment? Sometimes you do what you have to do, no matter what it costs you!"

"Hoshi-"

"Look, Stinger," Louis said, and his voice was taut and angry, "he did what he had to do, and I respect that. If you don't like the guy, fine. Stay away from him. No one's telling you that you have to socialize with him. But he's become a very good friend of mine, and I'm not going to listen to you running him down all the time, superior officer or not. So if you don't like it, _sir_ , don't like it, but don't talk to _me_ about it."

Felix backed away, book in hand. It should be disturbing, to hear that one of the senior pilots hated him so much, but for the most part, it wasn't a shock. It seemed like a lot of people who'd been on the ground on New Caprica couldn't look him in the eye. But what he hadn't expected was that for once, someone defended him, out loud, to a superior officer.

He smiled as he slipped away.

***

"You going to the dance tonight?" Felix asked as he handed Louis the orders for the next shift.

"Nah," Louis said, rifling through the orders. "I'm not a huge fan of boxing, and besides, I have… other plans." He smirked smugly. "What about you?"

"I've gotten drafted to keep book," Felix said.

"You going to put your tags in?" Louis asked. Felix just shrugged, and Louis's head snapped around. "You know if you do you're going to get called out."

"I know," Felix said evenly.

Louis frowned, and then glanced around the CIC. No one was paying attention to them. He leaned in. "Don't put them in."

"What?" Felix laughed. "Louis, I'll be fine."

"I know." Louis bit his lip. "It's just… just, be careful, okay? If you're up there, promise me you'll hit back."

It was like the air had been knocked out of him right then and there. Felix gaped at Louis, although Louis wouldn't meet his eyes. "I would," he finally said, uncertain if he was angry or not.

"Good." Louis shifted the orders. He finally looked up. "You aren't mad, are you?" he asked. "I know it's none of my business, but at the same time…." He shrugged, and he didn't have to say the words for Felix to know them. _I care._

"I'm not mad," Felix said. It was a lie- Louis's words had touched a raw, painful, angry spot in him, but… _I care._ That hit a deep chord too, and Felix wasn't willing to lose that. "I'll see you later. Have a good shift."

He walked out of the CIC, fists clenched.

***

When Felix walked into the Dance, the atmosphere was already electric, despite the fact he was early.

"Gaeta!" Mei Firelli waved to him. "You're keeping book, right?"

"Yeah." Felix headed over to the table Firelli had already set up. Firelli tossed him a pad and a pen, and then began drawing a chart on the chalkboard. "Should be a good turnout tonight," Felix said conversationally. "Lot of people have been looking forward to this."

"I know. We used to have them all the time on the _Pegasus_ ," Firelli said, wistfully.

"Yeah?" They had them maybe quarterly on the _Galactica._ "Do you fight in them?"

"When I'm not stuck with the administrative stuff, sure," Firelli said with a shrug. "Which reminds me…" he put an empty box on the table.

Felix stared at that empty box, and for a moment, he thought about Louis and his request. But Louis wasn’t even _coming_ to the Dance tonight- he was too busy frakking that gorilla of a marine. He pulled his tags off and defiantly tossed them in. "I'll get us started."

Firelli took his own tags off and tossed them next to Felix's with a grin. "This is gonna be _fun_ ," he said.

Fun. Funny. That wasn't the word Felix would have used for it.

***

The Dance was over, and Felix didn't feel like going to bed. He roamed the halls of the _Galactica_ , wishing he could talk to Dee. But Dee had her own problems, and it wasn't just self-flagellation to say she didn't need to be bothered right now.

He ended up in the observation deck. The deck had seen better days, and the drop into New Caprica's atmosphere had required the thick glass to be replaced with patches of metal. Without the view, it was frequently empty, and Felix thought it would be now.

"Oh, sorry," he said, backing out as soon as he saw the silhouette crouched in the corner. "I'll go."

"Felix?"

He couldn't not recognize that voice- it was in his ear constantly on duty. "Louis? What are you doing in here?"

"Is the Dance over?" Louis asked. He was sitting against the wall, playing with something.

"Yeah."

Louis glanced up at him and gave a grim smile. "Looks like you didn't get called out."

"Yeah. Kind of sobering, really."

"Your tags were in there?"

"I guess I think about what I did on New Caprica more than most people do."

"People think about what you did on New Caprica," Louis snapped. "They think about how you saved their asses." Felix remembered the fight he'd heard Louis having with Stinger and didn't say anything. Louis sighed and tipped his head back. "I'm guessing the duty lockers are going to be insane with people blowing off post-fight adrenaline."

"Yeah." Felix frowned. "Hey, are you okay?"

Louis shrugged. "Yeah," he said, but his voice wasn't convincing. But when Felix took a step forward, he scooted over so he could sit. Felix slid down the wall and sat beside him, shoulder to shoulder.

"What happened?"

"The thing with me and John is over."

"Oh." Felix wasn't sure what to say about that.

Louis looked down at the item in his hands. It was a small model plane. "Don't know why it bugs me," he said with a hollow laugh. "I was actually going to break it off myself in a few days. But he just handed me this and said 'it's over, no hard feelings,' and walked out and went to the Dance."

"Ouch."

"Yeah. This was how we'd let each other know we were looking for something that night," Louis said. "Either I'd put this in his locker or he'd put a little tank in mine. We thought it was funny."

"Ah." Felix struggled for something to say. Normally, this was the kind of situation he'd run screaming from, but Louis had been a _really_ good friend ever since the Exodus. So instead of fleeing, he thought about what Dee would say. "What happened? Was there someone else?"

"Something like that," Louis said, turning the plane over.

"I'm sorry," Felix said when he couldn't think of anything else to say.

"Yeah, well… it's the way things go, I guess," Louis said, shrugging. "Not the way I planned on the evening going, though."

Felix was suddenly very aware of the solid warmth of Louis's shoulder against his, and that their thighs were touching. The air in the room felt very heavy, and he could hear Louis's breathing. _If you wanted, we could…._

He almost said it. After all, he was still riding the energy of the Dance, and sex would have been the perfect way to dissipate it. He turned his head and saw Louis watching him, his brown eyes wide. All he would have to do would be to lean in and-

They both jerked back as the hatch slammed open, and there were drunken giggles. "In here," a woman said. "No one's in-"

"GET OUT!" both Felix and Louis yelled.

The couple lurched to a stop, the man's arms around the woman's waist. "Looks like someone else had the same idea first," the woman said.

"If you don't watch us, we won't watch you," the man leered. His hands roamed lower on the woman's hips. "Unless you guys _want_ to watch, that is…."

"Kevin!" the woman smacked him across the chest with half mock, half real irritation. "Come on. They were here first. We'll find someplace else."

"Fine. Sorry, guys. Have fun," Kevin said, and the woman pulled him out. As the hatch shut behind them, they both heard laughter.

"Well, that just made for a perfect end of the night," Louis said sourly when her laughter had faded from the room.

"Yeah," Felix said, forcing a laugh. "I don't know about you, but I'm pretty sure this isn't what sex looks like."

"No kidding." Louis moved away. "Well, on that note, I think I'm going to go back to my racks and hope I can at least go to sleep. Have a good night, Felix."

"Yeah. You, too."

Louis flashed a quick grin at him, and headed out. Felix sat in the dim room for a long moment alone, his side suddenly cold. Then he pushed to his feet and headed out himself. Louis had the right idea, and the sooner this weird, lousy night ended, the better.

***

 _"So, anyway, I was telling Firelli that the XQ-72 model has a different extender, but he's still convinced that it doesn't have the stability of the XQ-70. Delusional." Louis rolled his eyes as he stepped out of his pants._

 _"Incredibly," Felix agreed. He let his eyes roam over Louis's body. He had very nicely shaped legs, firm and leanly muscled. Felix had snuck more than one peek at them before._

 _Louis noticed him watching, and grinned back. "You going to do something about that?"_

 _"About what?" Felix asked, but he was able to arch an eyebrow._

 _"About this." Louis stepped in, kissing him deeply and then they were in the shower stall and-_

Felix's hand stilled on his erection, and he opened his eyes. It was quiet in the duty racks. Really quiet. He was almost sure everyone was asleep, and besides, his privacy curtain was closed. No one would know.

He checked to make _sure_ his curtain was drawn, and then reached up behind him and pulled down the vibrator. It was one that someone had given him as a joke, a long time ago, thin and clear and hard. He checked the curtain one more time, then wiggled out of his pants and lubed up the vibrator.

 _They were in the shower stall, and Louis was kissing him, and kissing him hard. The wall of the stall was cold under Felix's shoulder blades, but Louis's hands were moving on his back and over his ass._

 _"Come on, Felix," Louis said, his breath hot on Felix's ear. "Let me-"_

Then this was the part of the fantasy that Felix wasn't sure about the mechanics beyond what he'd seen in pornos, but as he pushed the vibrator up inside himself and set the vibration, it really, really didn't matter. Instead, he just thought of Louis's chest against his and his breath in his ear and his back under Felix's hands, and good _Gods_ , if he moved the thing just right it set off sparks that convulsed him. He covered his mouth with his free arm, choking back any sort of noise.

He came down, keeping his breathing as quietly as he could, and pulled the vibrator out. He lay still, listening for sounds that anyone else was awake. Nothing. He exhaled in relief.

He wiped the vibrator off on a rag and tucked it neatly back onto the shelf above his head, and then pulled his underwear and the covers back up. He turned over onto his side and tucked his hands under his cheek, much more relaxed. In the darkness, he could imagine Louis smiling back at him.

As he drifted off to sleep, he wondered if this was a good sign or a bad one.

***

Gaius frakking Baltar. When you thought about it, it was a wonder Felix was only this drunk.

The corridor was spinning. Felix was pretty certain that was a prelude to bad things happening, and it might be a good idea to get to his rack. But as the corridor spun more, he realized the head was a better idea. He lurched in that general direction, falling against the wall.

"Hey, easy," someone said, catching him. "You okay?"

"No. Not okay," Felix muttered. His stomach lurched. " _Really_ not okay."

"Yeah, I don’t think you're supposed to be that color. Let's go, Felix." Gentle but firm hands guided him, and finally a toilet appeared just under Felix's view. He fell down to his knees and let go. The hands kept rubbing his back. When he was done, he sat back on his heels and wiped his mouth on his jacket.

"The new bar was a bad idea, huh?" his rescuer said.

"Not the new bar." Felix groaned and sat back further.

"Whoa. Not here, Felix." The hand on his shoulder firmed, and dragged him to his feet. "Come on. Let's get you to your bunk and you can pass out there."

Finally standing, he saw that he was eye to eye with Louis. He groaned, and leaned against him. "All right," Louis laughed. "Come on. Let's get you some water first."

There was cool water, and then a shoulder under him and an arm around him as the walls slid by. Louis helped him undo the buttons on his jacket. "This one yours?" he asked, pointing to a bunk. Felix nodded. He collapsed in, and the ceiling began to spin. He focused on Louis instead. Louis was folding Felix's uniform.

"You okay?" Louis asked as he finished.

"Yeah. Thanks." Felix watched him. _This_ was the kind of guy that Helo and Dee were always telling him to find. The kind that held him up as he threw up and got him to bed. Folded his uniform and tucked him in. Louis bent over, looking concerned, and Felix grabbed his jacket and pulled him in.

The kiss was messy and awkward, but Felix didn't care. What he did notice was that, drunk as he was, they _fit_ together. He'd always thought that was a bullshit romance novel cliché, but kissing Louis was exactly like that. He pulled Louis closer, and with a thrill that pooled in the pit of his stomach, felt Louis wrap his arms around his waist. He opened his mouth, another jolt shooting through him as their tongues touched.

Then, inexplicably, Louis was pulling away. He slipped out of Felix's embrace, holding his wrists and breathing heavily.

"What?" Felix asked.

"No," Louis said, with evident difficulty. "Not tonight, Felix."

"What?" Felix demanded, a little angry. "You're the one who says he can keep sex and love separate. So come on. Let's do this. A little frak, a fun night, and then frak it all in the morning."

"No," Louis said dryly. He pulled away further. "First of all, you're incredibly drunk. You're incapable of consent right now."

"I'm the one making the offer," Felix pointed out.

"Yes, because you are _drunk._ I'm not. That's a good enough reason right there." Louis's face was set.

"Fine. If this isn't something you want-"

"I didn't say that." There was something very vulnerable suddenly on Louis's face. "It's something I want very much."

"Then why not do it?" Felix asked. "You're the one who has… has… _things_."

" _Things?_ " Louis asked, confused.

"Yeah. The gorilla."

"The goril… you call John a gorilla?" A touch of a smile tugged on Louis's lips, but Felix thought he might have imagined it. "You're not John."

"Yeah. I know. But it's not like I've waited deliberately, you know," Felix said. "I'm not some innocent little virgin that needs to be protected."

Louis's face was blank. "I know that. That's not why. It's not you that I'm protecting."

"Even though I'm drunk."

Louis sighed. "Felix, go to-"

"Baltar's on the _Galactica._ "

" _What?_ " Louis stilled, his eyes going wide.

Felix closed his eyes. "Baltar's on the _Galactica_ ," he mumbled. "I found out today. And Gaius… gods, Louis, I know it never came to anything but me getting shit on, but I loved him so much and he frakking betrayed me- no. Not just me. He betrayed all of us."

"By surrendering to the Cylons?"

"Yeah, but before that. More like… like…" Felix closed his eyes and saw the cold and mud and misery of New Caprica. "It was supposed to be a new start. I know we didn’t have much, but we had more than what we were using."

"You really believed in New Caprica, didn't you?" Louis asked softly.

"Yeah. I really did. I really believed in New Caprica, I really believed in Gaius, I really believed that this could be a life…" his stomach lurched again. "And I really believe I'm going to be sick again."

Louis jumped off the bed, looked around frantically, and managed to hand Felix the waste bin just in time. Felix finished and lay back on the bed, miserable. "Good thing you said no," he muttered as Louis made the waste bin disappear. "I wouldn't have wanted to puke on you."

"Can't argue with that." Louis disappeared, and Felix closed his eyes again. At least the room had stopped spinning, and his limbs were getting very heavy. It was almost possible to forget Gaius was on the _Galactica._

A clink barely intruded on his thoughts, and he cracked his eyes open just enough to see Louis stretching over him, putting a glass of water on the shelf. He wanted to move or to say thank you, but he was already fading into a heavy, drunken oblivion.

"Get some sleep," he heard Louis say. He wasn't sure if it was real, or if he just imagined it, but as he dropped off to sleep he felt the soft brush of a hand on his forehead.

***

"Louis?"

Louis looked up from the computer console. "Felix," he said with a quick smile. "Feeling better?"

"No. Not really. My head…"

Louis snickered. "I don't know how much you drank last night, but I'd put bets on the better part of a bottle."

"Something like that. Look, thanks for looking out for me last night."

"No problem," Louis said, and then looked back down at the console.

"I mean it." Felix rubbed the back of his neck. "I have this vague memory of hitting on you, and you telling me no because I was so drunk."

"Oh. Well, you were." Louis didn't look up.

"I'm not saying it would have been a bad thing to end up in bed with you," Felix said. "It's just that… it meant a lot to me that you'd do that. Thanks."

Louis finally looked up again. His eyes locked on Felix's, and Felix had a hard time looking away from them. It was funny. They were almost the same color as Gaius's, and in some ways so similar, but Louis was just so much more… _sincere_. He could see that now. "Do you remember what all you said last night?" Louis asked.

"Bits and pieces," Felix lied. He remembered the whole thing- unfortunately, he rarely forgot what he did or said when drunk. But the faster the rest of that conversation was forgotten, the better.

Louis looked back down at the computer. "Oh well," he said. "I'd better get this finished. The Admiral wants it soon."

"Yeah." Felix hesitated. "Want to grab dinner later?"

There was a long pause. "Yeah," Louis finally said. "I'll see you there."

***

The walls stopped moving. Felix was vaguely aware that someone had said his name. He blinked, staring at the gray walls and trying to reconstruct where he was and why his cheek felt like it had exploded and then been put back together.

"Felix."

The voice again. He turned his head, and his cheek hurt, but the pain didn't get worse. Not the end of the world, then. But everything still was woozy. And there were bars.

Bars. Suddenly, it began coming back to him, and he remembered…

 _Gaius._

He should be angry. He _remembered_ being angry, and that anger being so hot and coursing through him… but all he felt right now was numb. He wanted to feel angry, but it just wouldn't come.

"Felix."

He sat up, rubbing his face, and forcing his eyes to focus. "Louis?"

"Yeah." Louis was standing against the bars. "You okay?"

"I was supposed to meet you for dinner tonight," Felix remembered. Then he frowned. "How did you even know I was down here?"

"Adama had to pull me in to cover the rest of your shift."

"Oh. Oh, frak," Felix groaned, rubbing his forehead. "Louis, I'm sorry. I didn't mean-"

"It's okay," Louis cut him off. "So. I heard you tried to kill Gaius Baltar."

"Yeah." Felix wanted to sink back down onto the cot. He looked up at Louis suddenly with narrowed eyes. "Adama isn't trying to get you to find out why, is he?"

Louis shrugged. "I'm pretty sure assumes it's just because it's Gaius Baltar. I just told Adama that I needed to find out where you'd left the star charts. That's why I've got clearance to get down here."

"Oh."

"Was that all it was?" Louis asked hesitantly. "Because it was Gaius Baltar? Or was it him and you and…?"

"Am I still hung up on Gaius?" Felix clarified, a little incredulously. Louis at least had the grace to look embarrassed by his question. "I'm not," Felix said. "I'd be happy to see the bastard dead. But with him here…" He sighed. "It sounds stupid, but I've had to do a lot of rebuilding since New Caprica. I don't need him tearing down what I've done."

"It doesn't sound stupid at all," Louis said. "There are people…" he didn't finish. Felix didn't press him.

Louis hesitantly extended his hand through the bars. Felix stared at it for a long moment, and then leaned forward and stretched his own out just enough that their fingers touched. The touch was pure comfort. Their fingers laced together for a moment, and Louis squeezed. Felix closed his eyes.

A hatch clanged open and they heard voices, and they both pulled away from each other. "I'll see you when you get out of here," Louis said.

"All right." Felix managed a small grin. "Whenever I get out of here."

Louis smiled one more time, and then headed out. Felix watched him go with no small amount of wistfulness. Then he took a deep breath and braced himself for the questions Adama was sure to ask.

***

That night, Felix lay on the brig cot, hands folded behind his head, staring at a ceiling he'd never really seen before. He knew he should be thinking about Gaius, worrying about Adama, remembering the Eig- remembering _New Caprica._ But all he could think about was the way Louis looked, stretching his hand out through the bars.

As he drifted off to sleep, he finally admitted to himself that he really had it bad.

***

Joe's was loud tonight. It wasn't quite where Felix would have liked to go, but he couldn't think of any other place to ask Louis to join him. They ate dinner all the time together anyway, and getting both of them off the ship required an amount of maneuvering that seemed more appropriate to when- _if_ \- they were a couple. But Louis didn't seem to mind, and the two of them sat at a table in the corner, both wearing civilian clothing.

For as much time as they'd spent together, Felix had only seen Louis in civvies once or twice, and always the same outfit: a worn pair of faded jeans and a maroon sweater. Louis had confessed it was the only outfit he owned, the other few he'd had with him having been lost on the _Pegasus._ The place was crowded, and they were sitting close enough that he could see that Louis had nicked himself shaving, up by his ear. There was also the slight scent of after-shave about him. At this point in time, after-shave was almost an unheard of luxury. The scent made Felix's stomach twist in anticipation, because if Louis was using _aftershave_ , they probably had the same goals for the evening.

There was a band playing, as well. They weren't terribly good and they were a little too loud, but it meant they had to sit close to hear one another. Louis's thigh was pressed against his, and Felix was extremely aware of it as they talked.

He was also aware of Louis's hands. He had a hard time not watching them. Louis's fingers were long and slender, and they were running up and down his glass. It wasn't a huge leap to imagine those fingers running up and down himself. When he managed to look away from his hands, Louis was watching him.

"What?"

Louis didn't answer for a long moment. Their eyes locked, and Felix swallowed hard.

The music changed from a hard driving rock song to something slow. Louis quirked a smile. "Want to dance?" he asked.

"Sure." Felix managed not to jump up out of his seat.

They walked to the impromptu, crowded dance floor together, finding a spot on the edge. They stared at each other for a second, unsure of who was leading, but then Louis put his hand on Felix's waist and pulled him close, and Felix put a hand on Louis's shoulder. The press of the crowd meant they had to dance pressed closed to each other, but Felix didn't mind.

Louis's hand was warm in his free hand. Felix squeezed slightly, and Louis squeezed back. It made Felix daring enough to move a little closer, so they were chest to chest, thigh to thigh. Louis was just a little bit taller than him, but if Felix ducked his head just right, he could almost rest his head against Louis's shoulder. Louis leaned his check against Felix's hair, and they were just barely moving.

He could feel Louis breathing against him and the steady, rhythmic beat of his heart. The smell of his after-shave was stronger, and Felix closed his eyes. His hand curled around the back of Louis's neck, and their dancing became more of an embrace than dancing.

The song ended, and they pulled apart slightly. Felix smiled.

"You know," he said, at this point confident he was right about Louis's interest, "we could die tomorrow."

"Oh?" Louis asked, raising an eyebrow. All around them, people were dancing and laughing to the loud, driving music that was now playing.

"And there are idiots who insist you're a virgin if you've never tried certain forms of sex." Felix almost had to shout.

Louis snickered, and then schooled his face into something more serious. "Well, you never know," he said. "They could be right."

"They could be," Felix said solemnly.

"We can't let you die a virgin now, can we?" Louis's hand slid down from Felix's waist to ass, stopping for a long moment there before he just wrapped his arm around Felix's waist again. "Even if it's completely inaccurate." He smiled. "I take it you want to get out of here?"

"Only if you do," Felix said.

Louis grinned. "I've been waiting for you to ask. Come on."

They wound their way out of Joe's, Felix's fingers laced through Louis's as they worked through the crowd. They broke out into the corridor, where there was a lot more space and a lot less noise. For a moment, Felix felt a little awkward, but Louis just smiled at him.

"My rack work for you?" he asked. "I think it's probably pretty empty¬- a lot of them are working this shift."

"Sounds good," Felix agreed. He wasn't normally a hand holder, but he found he didn't really mind when Louis didn't pull his hand away.

There were three people in the duty locker when Louis opened the hatch. Narcho, Showboat, and Firelli were sitting at the table, playing a game of Triad. When they walked in, Showboat started to say something, and then her eyes widened.

"About time," she said with a snort. "Gentlemen, let's adjourn to the rec room."

"Why?" Narcho asked. Showboat cleared her throat and looked meaningful at Louis, who was giving them all a get-out-or-die glare, and Felix, who was trying not to die of embarrassment. Narcho, however, ignored the hint. "So? Let 'em use the privacy curtain."

"We can make more off the others in the rec room," Firelli said. He was grinning, but not quite looking at Louis and Felix. "Come on."

Narcho looked dubious. "We could watch."

"Oh, for gods' sake, show some class!" Showboat said. She twisted Narcho's ear and hauled him to his feet. "Out. Now."

"Hey! Ouch! Frak, Marcia, that really- all right! I'm coming!" Narcho followed Firelli, who had already gathered up all the cards and cubits, as well as their bottle. "You're such a soft touch," he told her.

"I am," she said. She glanced back at Louis and Felix. "I'll put the boots out for you, but don't expect more than twenty minutes or so."

"With the amount of time they've been eyeing each other, they'll probably both blow their wads after ten seconds," Narcho muttered. "In fact, we could just- ARGH! Marcia, stop that!"

"Thanks, Marcia," Louis called as they left and the hatch clanged shut. He turned to Felix, his face red. "Okay. That was one of the more embarrassing moments of my life."

"Same here," Felix agreed. He shifted from one foot to the other. "I don't know what…" he began, and then stopped because he didn't know quite how to finish that sentence.

Louis just smiled. "We've got twenty minutes," he said, and his smile went from gentle to predatory. "Let's just get back to where we meant to be." He stepped in, cupped Felix's face in his hands, and kissed him.

They'd kissed once, when Felix was drunk. This kiss was worlds better, with both of them sober enough to read each other's cues and Louis not at all reluctant. Louis's tongue touched Felix's lips, and Felix opened his mouth eagerly. He slid his hands under Louis's sweater, Louis's skin warm and smooth under his palms.

Louis shifted, one hand dropping down to pull Felix closer to him, the other hand smoothing up along Felix's cheek and then tangling in his hair. It was one of the nicest kisses that Felix had ever been on the receiving end of. It wasn't that Louis knew any fancy tricks or did anything out of the ordinary, but Felix had never felt like his partner's world had ceased to exist outside of him. All of Louis's attention was on this one moment, on _him_ , and he could feel it.

He began to work Louis's sweater off him, breaking away from their kiss long enough to pull the sweater over Louis's head. He'd seen Louis naked before, but this was the first time he'd ever been close enough to really notice the faint freckles that dotted Louis's shoulders, and certainly the first chance he'd ever had to nuzzle at Louis's neck, and to see the goose bumps that that action elicited.

His own shirt disappeared, and they pressed together, skin against skin. Louis's skin felt hot to his touch, and his hands on Felix's bare back were firm and possessive. They kissed again, and this time it wasn't so much gentle as it was passionate, and Louis began to push Felix towards the racks.

"Which one?" Felix gasped as his legs hit the bottom bunk.

"It's the bottom," Louis said, sinking to his knees. He undid Felix's pants, pulling them down his thighs. Felix was about to sit when Louis took his cock into his mouth, and _good gods_ , his eyes nearly rolled back into his head. He touched Louis's hair gently. It was fine and soft, and it made Felix want to tangle his fingers in it. But that was something he had always hated when other men did it to him, and he had no idea what Louis would want. And as Louis ran his tongue along Felix's shaft, Felix was pretty positive his knees were going to give out.

Louis's hands were on his hips, moving around to the back to cup his ass. Felix moaned, trying to keep from thrusting into Louis's mouth. If Louis kept this up, he wasn't going to last much longer.

Mercifully or cruelly- he honestly couldn't decide which- Louis released him, sitting back on his heels. He smiled up at Felix, and Felix's knees finally gave way. He sat down on Louis's bed and touched his cheek.

Louis's smile deepened. "You okay?"

"Hell, yeah."

Louis's hands rested on Felix's thighs. He spread them and inched closer until he was right in between Felix's legs. "Do you want to keep doing this?" he asked, running his fingers along Felix's shaft. "Or do you want to do something else?"

For a moment, Felix hesitated, just because Louis was kneeling _right there_ and all he had to do was say the word and Louis's mouth would be back on him. Louis raised his eyebrows. "It's fine if you want to keep doing this," he said. "We don't _have_ to do anything else. Especially if you're not sure you'll like it."

"Oh, I'm pretty sure I will," Felix hastened to assure him. "I haven't ever… but I've experimented." Louis looked at him questioningly, and Felix blushed. "I have a… er…"

"Ah." Louis's grin turned wolfish. "Yeah. I tend to be a more a five fingered guy myself when it comes to that," he said, demonstrating on Felix. Felix's breath caught. "But if that's what you want…" he straightened up on his knees.

"If you want," Felix murmured.

Louis froze, and then laughed. "Gods, Felix. Believe me, I've had fantasies about frakking you for months now."

"Months, huh?" Felix asked, not sure if he should be flattered or terrified that he couldn't meet expectations. He decided not to think about it and cupped the back of Louis's head. "Then let's put you out of your misery," he said, and kissed Louis deeply. As he did, Louis pushed him back on the bed.

"The only thing is," Louis said as they lay back, "I don't have a condom. Haven't for ages. I'm clean, though."

"I'm clean, too," Felix said. "Got checked out after New Capri-" he cut off, because what Louis did with his hand was reason to shut up.

Louis was still wearing his jeans. It was awkward, reaching down and trying to undo the button, but Felix finally managed to get it done, grateful that Louis hadn't worn a belt, too. He managed to start working the jeans over Louis's hips, and Louis wiggled out of them. Then they were both naked, and Louis crawled over Felix, settling in between his legs and kissing him deeply.

Felix kissed back, wrapping his arms around Louis and thrusting up with his hips. Louis groaned, his forearms tightening around Felix's shoulders as he tipped his head up, exposing his throat. Felix craned up, kissing along the tendons of Louis's neck. He made his way to Louis's ear, and Louis shivered, pressing his erection harder against Felix's hip.

"Gods, Felix…."

"You ready to do this?" Felix whispered. There was a nervous feeling in the pit of his stomach, but it was the exciting kind of nerves, and when Louis looked down at him, he smiled back up at him challengingly. "Come on."

Louis nodded, and then nudged Felix's shoulder, prompting him to turn over. Felix obeyed, grabbing the pillow and hugging it with both arms. Louis leaned over him, grabbing a tube of lube off one of the shelves. Felix waited with bated breath as Louis prepared himself.

"This might be a little easier if you're up on your knees," Louis said, gripping Felix's hips and pulling him up gently. He slid one finger up Felix's ass. "You okay?" Louis asked.

"Fine," Felix said. It was an awkward feeling, especially with a real person instead of a toy, and it wasn't necessarily comfortable, but it wasn't bad. He took a deep breath, and then another as Louis inserted another finger.

"If you want to stop at any time," Louis said, "make sure you tell me, okay? I don't care what I'm doing, I'll stop."

"All right. Stop warning me and frak me already, all right?" Felix said with a mock-growl. "Come on, Louis. Not to put too fine a point on it, but I've been waiting a hell of a long time for this."

"Hope I live up to it," Louis muttered, but then something warm and wet and blunt was pushing against Felix's entrance, and he concentrated on relaxing as Louis pushed in.

It did hurt, but not really in a bad way. The stretching burned, but at the same time, there was a hot pleasure that built, and Felix knew if Louis found the right spot he'd be-

Louis found the right spot.

He groaned, bucking his hips back against Louis, his arms and shoulders trembling. Louis rubbed his back with one hand, and then reached around and began to stroke his cock with the other. Felix found himself beginning to shake.

Louis was speeding up, his breath coming faster. Something about that only turned Felix on more, and he tried to move with Louis. It didn't quite work and he soon gave up, ducking his head and just letting Louis thrust into him, until his own world exploded.

Orgasms with a vibrator were nothing like orgasms with a human, that was for damn sure.

He came down, and Louis wasn't really moving anymore. He looked back over his shoulder to see Louis's expression; closed eyes, sweaty, tousled hair, and a small smile tugging on his lips. Louis opened his eyes, and his smile widened.

"You all right?" he asked, more than a little breathless. Felix nodded. "I'm pulling out, okay?" He pulled out and collapsed onto the mattress on his back, trying to get his breath back. "Good gods, Felix. You're…"

"It was okay?" Felix asked, a little anxious when Louis didn't answer.

Louis cracked one eye opened, then wrapped an arm around Felix's shoulders and pulled him down to his side. "More than okay," he said. He kissed Felix's temple, then his hair, then caught his chin and pressed a long, lingering kiss to his lips. "Stay the night?" he asked, when they broke apart.

 _Stay the night._ Felix hadn't actually slept next to anyone since academy. He smiled. "I'd love to."

***

Felix didn't sleep well that night. He hadn't slept in the same bed as someone else in years, and the racks weren't quite big enough for two anyway. It was close and hot and sweaty, especially since Louis kept the privacy curtain shut. But he dozed off, and all too soon Louis's alarm went off.

"I do not want to get up," Felix groaned as Louis smacked the offending clock.

"You and me both," Louis sighed. He checked the time, and then groaned. "I was really hoping to wake up early and have you turn the tables this morning, too."

Felix tried to look casual as he shrugged. "Another time?"

"Definitely." Louis sighed and pushed the curtain back. The duty locker was mostly dark, and everyone was still asleep. He bent over and found enough clothes to hand to Felix, and they made their way to the head.

They'd taken a shower together last night, a quick affair that didn't result in sex but a lot of kissing, tickling, and laughing. This morning felt a little different, and Felix hoped it was just the fact that they actually had to get clean and go on duty rather than Louis had got what he wanted and was done with this. But when Louis got out of the shower, his smile was bright and happy, and it eased Felix's worries.

"I'll have to thank John," he said, toweling off his hair.

Louis frowned in puzzlement. "John? What for?"

"For finding someone else," Felix said. "Leaving you open for me. I guess I owe him one or something."

"John didn't find someone else."

"What?" Felix paused. "I thought you said there was someone else."

"Sort of," Louis pulled his pants on. "John just wanted to be the dumper, not the dumped. Not that I blame him," he added with a wry smile. "Being dumped does sting the pride. But he realized the end was coming." He hitched his pants over his hips and buttoned them. "Because of you," he clarified.

"Me? But that was ages ago!" Felix gawked at him. "Why didn't you say something?"

"Wasn't sure you felt the same way." To Louis, it was all extremely simple. Then he leered. "Besides, the build up is always fun."

"Yes, but we could have been having _sex_ all this time," Felix teased.

Louis shrugged and leaned over to kiss him on the lips. "Well, we'll just have to make up for lost time, right?" He cupped Felix's cheek, a tender gesture that made Felix want to close his eyes. "You know this isn't just sex for me, right?" he asked, his voice lower.

Felix leaned his cheek into Louis's caress. "Me, either."

"Good." Louis leaned in and kissed him, long and lingering, on the lips. "Come on," he sighed as he pulled back. "We'd better go."

"I know." They pulled apart, and Felix finished dressing. He was doing his jacket up when Louis gently gripped his wrists and pulled him into an embrace, holding him close. Felix sighed, nestling in, holding Louis tight. "I've been waiting a long time for something good to happen," Felix whispered. "It's about time."

Louis just laughed.  
  



End file.
